For the most part, mountain biking is a great thing. You make loads of friends, stay healthy and get to explore the outdoors and have fun at the same time. However, there’s a difference between just riding a mountain bike and being a full-blown mountain biker. If these 10 things describe you and your mates, there’s a good chance you fall into the latter camp…
1. Your shins are always covered in scabs
Whether it’s from hitting pedals against them, getting scraped by branches, pummelled by rocks or whipped by bushes, your lower limbs are always either healing or freshly wounded. What’s more, you’re inordinately proud of this fact and enjoy flaunting your ruined shins, despite the fact you frequently wake up with the bedsheets stuck to your legs.
2. Your bike costs at least as much as your car
I mean, if you can afford a nice car then it means you can afford a really nice bike, right? Simple logic, that is. Seeing a fancy motor with a cheap bike on the roofrack just confuses – surely the primary purpose of any vehicle is to transport you and your shiny bike to the trails?
3. You have a collection of tyres for all conditions and every season
Each change of season poses a real challenge. Is it time to dig out the fast rolling summer tyres yet or should you keep your spiky intermediates on? Maybe you could keep those but move to the harder compound ones? Or how about one of those on the front and one of the other the rear? It takes so much time to decide on a rubber setup and then change the bloody things that you usually have to go for a shorter ride than originally intended.
4. You remember people by their bikes, not their names
“You know Steve?”
5. You can tell who’s been riding your trails recently by the tracks
6. You can always find an excuse to justify a new bike part
7. You’re at the local bike shop so much people think you work there
8. Your suntan starts at the wrists and ends just below your shoulders
9. You have a box full of parts that are totally obsolete that you refuse to throw out
10. You view any new ‘standard’ or technology with intense suspicion
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